How to Know When Your Self-Help Efforts Go Too Far

Too much of a good thing can cause more harm than good. You started out with good intentions but, how do you know if you went too far with your intentions? When should you stop? What are we even talking about? I’m talking about self-help.

Stuck in the self-help section of your library? Yeah, I know the feeling. Once you start changing and turning over new leaves in your life, it’s like an addiction.

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The more you change, the better your life should get, right? Wrong. That, there, should have sounded off an alarm in your head. You know what they say about too much of a good thing.

I’m not knocking self-help. I live in self-help books. I am the self-proclaimed self-help guru but, you should know your limits. Here is how you know whether you’ve gone too far.

Signs of Self-Help Overload

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You’re becoming a drama queen.

The next two subheadings and their descriptions will totally explain everything. Keep on reading. Once you’ve hit your self-help max, you just can’t help but overdramatize what is actually happening in the real world.

The self-help books blinded you and now you can’t see. Don’t worry we’ll fix your eyes. Keep reading.

You feel hopeless.

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“There is no hope for you. None, at all! Everyone is doing better and this self-help thing is not working. Nothing you ever do will come to fruition at the rate you’re going!”

Dramatic? Yes. But this is really how some us think including me. I will admit. I’m guilty.

The feeling of hopelessness compounds when added to what you see on social media. All you see are success stories! You know that is not the whole story, but your subconscious mind still makes you feel like dirt.

You feel as if you have never done enough.

You can always be doing better. So, what you won the award for Most Active Member in your organization? You should have done more.

You should have made better flyers, invited more people, been friendlier. You should have donated your kidney! There is always more that can be done.

What to do about it?

Limit your exposure to self-help content.

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Yeah, I know. It’s hard. Making these changes are so addicting especially after seeing good results. But, try it.

I am telling you that you will feel refreshed. Limit yourself to 3 self-help contents a month and stick to it. Pick and choose which advice you want to follow and see what happens.

Everyone has different opinions on how to be a better person. Too many people telling you what’s best can be confusing and mentally exhausting. Having some type of mental guideline or limit will help to relieve you a little.

Realize you will never be perfect.

I am not insulting you. Nobody is perfect. I know I’m definitely not.

Realize there is no way that you can apply all the self-help advice and not mess up somewhere. Please do not take this as a challenge. I know someone out there had the desire to accept that as a challenge.

Take a break from the self-help.

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Imperfection is what makes us human. Self-help is a great way to advance in the world but, be cognizant of how much advice you are taking in. Do not let self-help change you into someone completely different.

You are special. Someone somewhere admires you for your “flawed” attributes. There is no need for self-help all the time. Change can be a great tool for advancement, but too much change can make you a stranger even to yourself. Keep being awesome!

Thanks for reading my rant,

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Like my post, follow my blog, and comment below. Tell me about a time when you were a little too eager with the self-help content.

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Shika Tamaklo is a pharmacist who graduated from Mercer University (2020). She is a college lifestyle blogger who writes on fitness, health, life struggles, creative side hustles and, occasionally dabbles in creative writing.

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